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“She’s the otherworldly Scarlett to my clueless Rhett. “I came to Los Angeles for the first time in 1994,” Cruz begins. She has come a long way on this boulevard of dreams—the Lady with the Cats, now waving a sword at the Man with the Hat. She adores it the way a first-grader adores a golden-retriever puppy—in an unself-conscious, non-ironic way.

She will sing “Hollaback Girl,” by Gwen Stefani, and, if she is so compelled, “Without Me,” by Eminem.

The Spanish Oscar-winning power couple joined U2 onstage in Barcelona during ' Mysterious Ways' and true awkwardness followed.

Javier, 46, appeared to be drunk as he dirty danced around Bono, who humoured him for a while before kicking him and his feather boa off the stage. In the end, Penelope, 41, got more VIP treatment than her husband of five years.

There are oddities that make sense only in Los Angeles—canary-yellow Rolls-Royces, lasagna cupcakes, agents. Here is a boulevard where Meryl Streep shares the glory with Erik Estrada; where Audrey Hepburn earns the same real estate as Rin Tin Tin; where a Spider-Man impersonator once socked a Charlie Chaplin impersonator in the face.